- Issue No. 41   -

"It is not the straining for great things that is most effective; it is the doing of the little things, the common duties, a little better and better."

Elizabeth Stuart Phelps
1844-1911, Writer

Hello and welcome,

Australian Region Conference has come and gone for another year. It was great to catch up with old friends, corral some presenters for International Convention in 2007 and generally kick back.  I enjoyed the fact that the venue was a football club - Penrith Panthers, west of Sydney.  The bus driver from the airport was very nonplussed to discover that no, I was not attending the match on Saturday night!  I might have done, had we not had the speech contest and awards dinner, because I'm sure the atmosphere would have been electric! 

Best wishes,

Bronwyn   

In this Issue:

1. Leadership Success Tip
2. ITC History

3. Computer corner:  20 Things They Don't Want You to Know 
4. News from Mt Gravatt Communicators
5. Five free tutorials for adult and community learners
6. Meeting Success Tip
7. Closing Thought

1. Leadership Success Tip:

This week's tip comes from Ron Sargent, CEO of the big office resources firm, Staples. He made a point of being involved in customer service.  "Get your hands dirty," he said.  "Before you can be a great leader, you need to understand the inner workings of the business and where and how the greatest impact can be made."

2.  ITC History

“The progress of the group is the sum total of the development and advancement of the individual members of the group and the growth of the group is the stimulant for the improvement of the individual.”

With these profound words, Ernestine White outlined her credo at the first ITC assembly on August 11, 1939 where she was presented with a gavel that had been used by the Vice President of the United States.

Read more about ITC History

3. Computer corner:    20 Things They Don't Want You to Know 

I'm going to spill the beans about a bunch of things that technology companies would rather you didn't know. These insider tips will help you cut through hype when you shop, save money when you buy, and get the most out of products you already own.  Read on …

4.  News from Mt Gravatt Communicators

I have now missed two meetings of Mt Gravatt Communicators because of family commitments.  I can report that their theme last meeting was Lessons of History, and that there were speeches to inform, a speech to entertain, an “ums and ahs report” and evaluations .. and I wish I had been there to hear all of the different interpretations of the theme.

If you belong to ITC and would like to share news of your club, please email it to me.

Hilary reports:   

I used your Past, Present, Future theme for our meeting Tuesday evening. Taupo Speechmasters has several new members since our relaunch so it was helpful for me as compere to link speakers with historical ITC facts, current details and what the future might hold.

Our lexicology session was based on the tenses in the English language and the Issues of the Day had people being given a slip of paper with a word e.g. education, hairstyles, clothing etc. - both of these sessions used the past, present and future theme as well. It was an excellent meeting.

5.  Words of Encouragement

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up
in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to
the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

 Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.  The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and colour of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every colour and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.  One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.  Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days and weeks passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of
the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

 As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.  He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.

 It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.  The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."

How do you encourage yourself to bounce back from the setbacks in your life?

The blind man in this story was able to provide some inspiration that lifted the other man's spirits - even for just an hour each day.  This helped him to stay positive and look forward to life after recovery.

When you lose a sale, miss a deadline, become rundown, or feel overloaded with work, do you encourage yourself to bounce back quickly?

A close friend of mine once said "each morning when I look at myself in the mirror I say 'now, that's the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with'.  Since I'm stuck with you, I need to treat you with kindness, care and encouragement".

Putting yourself down reduces the effort you put into your next sale, project, client, etc.  Research has found that people who don't believe in their abilities or encourage themselves to bounce back, tend not to try as hard to achieve their goals - especially after  a setback.

Make sure you are actively encouraging yourself to bounce back after any setback.

ACTION STEPS:

1. Use Encouraging Language
Instead of putting yourself down, be positive and optimistic that you will bounce back and achieve whatever you set your mind to.

Instead of saying: 'I'll never get this right'
* Try: 'So far it has been tough, but that can still change'

Instead of saying: 'I'm just not good enough for this'
* Try: 'I'll never know what's possible until I really give it my best effort and don't give up'

Instead of saying: 'This will never work'
* Try: 'My mistakes have shown me what doesn't work, and that creates a path to show me what will work'

Instead of saying: 'It's all too hard'

*Try: 'It's difficult, but not impossible'

2. Get a Support/Mentor Group
Every top athlete has a coach, and every racing car driver has a support crew.  Do you have a group of people who support you?  You may be the support for other people, however where do you turn to when you need support, advice, or a sounding board?  Don’t don't give me that rubbish of 'I don't need anyone - I can manage just fine alone'.  Everyone needs someone, some help, at some stage.  Don't be a hero - you won't get any 'extra points' for trying to bounce back without help.

Find at least two people in your professional or personal circle who can offer you advice, support or just listen to you whenever you have a setback.  If you would like information about my Resilience Mentoring Group, scroll down to the 'What's Happening: Events, Seminars and Projects' section to read all about it.

3. Actively encourage the people you work with to bounce back.
As part of my personal training I recently completed a fitness test that required me (and 20 others) to complete a 2.4km run in under 10 minutes.  In the final kilometre there
was one guy who was really struggling.  He kept stopping and starting and seemed to have run out of energy.  As each person ran past him, they gave a few words of encouragement which seemed to motivate him to keep trying.  Although he didn't make it back within 10 minutes, he did exceed his personal best time and was very grateful to each person who slowed down to help lift his spirits.

In your workplace, if people are feeling down after a sales rejection, feeling overloaded from a looming deadline – take a moment to encourage them.  It may be a smile, a few positive words, having lunch with them, or whatever.  Just make the effort.

Michael Licenblat B.Sc.(Psych), Resilience Expert

'Tear through your tension, be strong with stress 

and become powerful under pressure

 6.   Communication Success Tip

 In conversation, listening is vital because:

-  Constant talking does not contribute to the conversation

-  It allows you time to consider what you are going to say next

-  It allows you to polish what you are going to say for maximum impact and timing

-  It allows you to watch and feel the emotions and tenor of what the others are saying

-  Attentive, sincere silence offers sympathy of attention even when you do not agree and encourages confidence and the sense of appreciation that brings out the best in people

7.  Closing Thought

"Your only limitations are those you set up in your mind, or permit others to set up for you."

-- Og Mandino

The Communication Edge is available to both members and non-members of ITC.  So please don’t hesitate to forward it to someone who might enjoy it.

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ã 2006 Unless otherwise attributed, the material in The Communication Edge is written by Bronwyn Ritchie and is being used for International Training in Communication.  All rights reserved.  You are welcome to reproduce any of it, but on condition that the following resource box accompanies it:

ITC is an international organisation offering training in communication, leadership and organisation skills.  International Training in Communication provides opportunities for personal growth that show immediate results.  The ITC website is at http://www.itcintl.com/. 

For more Communication tips and articles subscribe to The Communication Edge. Email: subscribe@itcmtgravatt.org with the word Subscribe in the subject line.