Pivotal Fun








The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.

- Mitch Hedberg


Nobody beats Vitas Gerulaitis 17 times in a row. 

- Vitas Gerulaitis, on finally beating Jimmy Connors


I enjoyed the position I was in as a tennis player. I was to blame when I lost. I was to

blame when I won. And I really like that, because I played soccer a lot too, and I couldn't stand it when I had to blame it on the goalkeeper. 
Roger Federer 

I used to cut guitars out of a piece of cardboard to copy the Strat look. I used a backwards tennis racket for a while and graduated to the cardboard cutout. 
Rick Springfield 


If you can keep playing tennis when somebody is shooting a gun down the street, that's concentration. 
Serena Williams


Ted Tinling, on former WTA player Gabriela Sabatini...
"She looks like Marilyn Monroe and walks like John Wayne."


Yannick Noah, when asked what he thought was the best part of his game.
"My beautiful legs"


"I threw everything and the kitchen sink at him, so he went into the bathroom and got the tub"
- Andy Roddick after losing to Roger Federer in the Wimbledon final 2004


… and today’s jokes



Too Much Tennis

You know you watch too much tennis when you think about what every sport would be like with a racquet.

You know you watch too much tennis when you can impersonate every player.

You know you watch too much tennis when you can name top 100 players but can't remember your kids’ names.

You know you watch too much tennis when you keep track of every statistic of every player, and their ranking and ranking points but can't ace Statistics in school.

You know you watch too much tennis when you name your kids after pros.

You know you play too much tennis when you overhead smash your kid brother.

You know you play too much tennis when you call the line judge whenever there is an argument.

You know you play too much tennis when instead of fighting someone who stole your girlfriend; you challenge him to a pro-set match.

You know you play too much tennis when you are sitting on the court right now with a laptop reading this.


A middle management executive has to take on some sport, by his doctor's orders, so he decides to play tennis. After a couple of weeks his secretary asks him how he's doing. "It's going fine, " the manager says. "When I'm on the court and I see the ball speeding towards me, my brain immediately says, 'To the corner! Back hand! To the net! Smash! Go back!'" "Really? What happens then?" the secretary asks. "Then my body says, 'Who? Me? You must be kidding!'" 


 Q: What did one tennis ball say to the other tennis ball?

A: “See you round.”

Why should you never fall in love with a tennis player?
To them, "Love" means nothing.


Q: Why are fish never good tennis players?
A: They don't like getting close to the net.


A boy went up to his tennis coach & said " I need a new racquet, this one's really busted up". 
The Coach said "yeah, that racquet's got more chips in it than Mcdonalds". 


Q: How many tennis players does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: “What do you mean it was out, it was in!!!” 


Q. Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible?
A. When Joseph served in Pharaoh's court. 


Q: What is the definition of endless love?

A. Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis






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