Tag Archive for: happiness

pursuit of happiness

To go by the words of Abraham Lincoln, "most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."

These words find support in what the famous psychologist Richard Lazarus explained in his Cognitive Mediational Theory(1991). In this theory, Lazarus proposed that the most important aspect of any emotional experience is how the person interprets, or appraises the stimulus that causes the emotional reaction. in simple terms, the happy man is he, who thinks he is.

Nobody's life is hunky-dory all the time. Every person has to face trials and tribulations, go through difficult times. He indeed, is wise, who chooses to put on the glasses of optimism and faith and interprets the events of his life as positively as humanely possible.

Life, if you look at it this way, is not a race. It is a hurdle race. You can't question the presence of hurdles. They will be there, for that's the nature of the sport. If you bang your head on the hurdles and try to remove them out of your path, you going against the flow, attempting the illogical and the fruitless.

Not just that,you are not putting your heart and soul to win the race, for your focus has actually slipped into some other territory. There is no way you are going to win in this manner. If you lose your strength at the sight of a hurdle, and ask "why such things happen to me all the time, WHY ME?", you yourself are delaying your victory.

Again, if you just sit there, waiting for the hurdle to disappear, you are only deceiving yourself.

Not just the best, but the only option you have is to jump over the hurdles, as and when they come, without creating any fuss.

It often helps if you are a person deeply connected to nature. Feeling low? Well then go smell the flowers, let the breeze kiss your hair, leave your slippers on the porch and let your feet feel the moist grass, savour the delightful courtship dance of the butterflies, go out in the sun and let the blameless blue of the winter sky be your confidante, let the zephyr carry your message to that distant companion. Go, fall in love with nature.

Learn to appreciate the beauty that the mundane things of everyday life have to offer. Just imagine life without the things you take the most for granted. You will know their value then.




Maintain a gratitude journal. list all those things, people and moments in it that had made you smile someday and that make your everyday life worth living. It can be your coffee mug, or a compliment your teacher paid you that fine day, anything. When you are low in spirits, just flip through its pages, and you will have a hundred and one things to be happy about.

It is often seen that people find it easy to forgive, but not to forget. What we don't understand is, forgiveness is incomplete in such a scenario. By repeating emotional episodes over and over in our mind, we inadvertently etch them in our memory. So, the key is to let go, to not think at all about anything unpleasant that we have been through.

Equally important is to first know ourselves. It is always desirable to keep the doors of improvement open, but we also need to learn to distinguish between comments that are credible and that are not. If you have put on a white dress and a friend of yours with black sunglasses comes and tell you that the black dress you have worn does not look good on you, and on top of that, you get upset on hearing that... well, to say the least, nothing can be more ridiculous.

Not to forget, nothing succeeds like success and the high one gets out of achievement is just unmatched.

Have a clearly defined goal, make sure it is challenging enough but realistic and put in every possible effort to achieve it. If you are able to achieve it, well and fine. If not, you did not lose either, in the actual sense of the term, for in the process, you actually grew as a person and learnt things you not have, had you not been in pursuit of the goal. At least you will not be amongst those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

Last, but not the least, cultivate a taste for literature, for poetry. It will be with you when nobody else is. Go, live your days of happiness!!!!

Sudha Shashwati is a psychology major in University of Delhi and considers positive psychology to be her niche. She is an out and out humanistic psychologist, a hopeless romantic and a shouting optimist. When not drowned in literature, she loves spreading sunshine around through her writings at http://thelidislifted.blogspot.in

Here are some thoughts for finding and experiencing joy in your life. If there were one thing I could wish upon my family, friends and the readers of this [article], it would be joy in everything they do!

Know your purpose. Nothing will bring you joy more than knowing what it is that you are about on this earth. Not knowing brings sadness, wondering, fear and lack of fulfilment. Above all, find out what your unique purpose is here on this earth - then fulfil it! As you do, you will experience joy!

Live purposefully. This is a follow up to number one. It is one thing to know your purpose, but then you need to live according to that purpose. This is a matter of priorities. Let your actions and schedule reflect your purpose. Don't react to circumstances and let them cause you to live without your purpose fully in site. Living without your purpose will cause frustration. Living purposefully will bring you deep satisfaction and joy!

Stretch yourself. Don't settle into the status quo. That will leave you unfulfilled. Always look to stretch yourself. Whatever you are doing, stretch yourself to do more! Stretching yourself will break the limits you have set for yourself and will cause you to find joy in your expanded horizons!

Give more than you take. It brings happiness to accumulate. It brings joy to give away. Sure, getting the car you worked hard for will bring you a sense of satisfaction and even happiness. But it won't bring you joy. Giving something away to the less fortunate will bring you deep, abiding joy.

Surprise yourself, and others too. The words here are spontaneity and surprise! Every once in a while, do the unexpected. It will cause everybody to sit back and say, "Wow, where did that come from?" It will put a little joy in your life, and theirs.

Indulge yourself sometimes. Too much indulgence and you are caught in the happiness trap. Looking for the next purchase, celebration etc to bring you a little "happiness high." But if you will allow yourself an infrequent indulgence as a reward for a job well done and a life well lived, you will appreciate the indulgence and experience the joy of it.

Laugh a little - no, a lot! Most people are just too serious. We need to laugh a little - no, a lot! Learn to laugh daily, even if you have to learn to laugh in bad situations. This life is to be enjoyed! The next time you go to the movie rental store, get a comedy and let loose! Let yourself laugh!

Joy can be yours! Look for it, pursue it and enjoy it!

.........................................................
Chris Widener is an internationally recognized speaker, author and radio host. He is the author of five books and audio series as well as over 350 success articles. If you would like to order Chris' products, including his Newest Release, The Angel Inside as well as Live the Life You Always Dreamed Of, The Secrets of Influence or his CD series, The Extraordinary Leaders Seminar go to http://www.chriswidener.com or call 800-929-0434.

 

Our vision of life, our expectations and mindset form either bridges to our achievement in life or stumbling blocks for same. Nobody can go beyond the furthest point of his or her imagination and knowledge. The earlier we know this in life, the better for us all.

Here are activities and mindsets can help you gain a supportive vision for life:

1. Imagination: Imagination builds cities, conquers diseases, develops a career, and sets off a relationship. Albert Einstein, the great atomic energy scientist said that imagination is superior to intelligence. That is to say that if you can extend yourself and envision the life you want without feeling limited by the problems of the present times, you have a great chance of achieving what you want. You have to imagine yourself being able to do everything required to ensure peace and progress for yourself and the rest of mankind. Put your imagination to good use and you will be well served.

2. Dreams: If you can't think of it, if you can't dream having it, if you can't see you doing it ahead of the action time, then it is not realizable. Give yourself the chance to dream and to risk. What do you want? If you can dream it, you can do it. You have the power in your hands. Your mental power is limitless. Majority of men and women lead incomplete lives when they can have more. They never really investigate their potentialities. They erroneously believe that tomorrow must be as unfulfilling as yesterday.

3. Desire: Your desire is the propelling force for the achievement of your goals and life purpose. Desire is the unexpressed possibility of an idea wishing to be expressed. You must want something before you can get it. The desire for a good life must remain constant no matter your circumstances in life. School your desires though and be sure it is not on mundane things.

4. Knowledge: You must seek knowledge unceasingly. You need quality knowledge for quality life. Hidden treasures are inside books, seminars and in network of net worthy people. University education is good and necessary. But daily study and action is the key to power and success. You cannot go beyond your knowledge in life. We are affected knowledge. What you don't know will hurt you. What you don't know will adversely affect your life, said Jim Rohn. You must continue to learn to remain alive and for a chance to succeed in life. Financial intelligence is critical. Wealth creation attitude is a necessity.

5. Faith: Faith means confidence, trust and belief. You need faith in two important areas of your life - (1) Faith in God, the Eternal Father and His Son Jesus Christ and the fact that they want you to be a success in life. (2) Faith in Yourself, in your ability to reach your fullest potential. And the good news is that your faith in God and yourself can be grown over time by study and action.

6. Purpose: Everyone has a WHY of his or her existence. What do you think is the WHY of your existence? What are you drawn to naturally that you feel at home doing? What do you enjoy especially in service to other people? What service to others excites you each time you think of or do it? One of the synonyms of purpose is reason. So, what do you imagine to be the reason(s) why God created you? You can find your why. You need to find your why.

7. Passion: The synonyms of passion include enthusiasm, zeal and excitement. You need to be passionate or enthusiastic about your life purpose, your goals and objectives. You need to pursue everything before you with zeal. You need to be excited about your studies, work and activities. And this is in spite of the circumstances. It is your life we are talking about here and the best way to live your life is to do so passionately. Only a passion driven life is worth living.

8. Goals, Strategies, Action: To succeed in life, you must specify what you want at every point in time, specify strategies (plan of action) and take those actions consistently. It is called goals, strategies and action (GSA). This is the same method used and advocated by J. Paul Getty, an American multi-billionaire in the 1960s and at that time the richest man on earth. Mr. Getty actually advocated massive action. Action would give you experience, experience would give you evidence and evidence would give you a testimony that it is true or not, right or wrong. Nothing happens unless you take action. In fact, there is no real knowledge without action.

Prepare by study, by prayer, by faith and by action and you would truly be ready for life, leadership and service. These activities will change your life. These activities will change you to a person of power and put you in a position to change the world for good. You will find happiness, wealth, peace and your place in service to your fellow men than in doing drug and crime.

 

Pivotal Network member, Francis Nmeribe helps people who desire a joyful relationship in their dating, courtship and marriage relationships. He is the author of numerous great relationship and personal development articles and books including - "Foundation For Joyful Relationships", "Wrong Reasons For Getting Married", "Growing From Your Experiences", "Action Quotes". If you need help with your dating, courtship and marriage relationships, contact Francis Nmeribe at [http://www.successpublishers.com.ng]. Subscribe to the RSS Feeds and get a free copy of the Ebook version of "Wrong Reasons For Getting Married". Read more free relationship articles on my blog http://marryright.wordpress.com. Email: Francis19561@hotmail.com.

Photo by Ethan Robertson on Unsplash

Does your home attract positive people and prosperity? Are you living in and enjoying your environment? Whether the answer is no, or yes, the hints I am sharing will benefit you

   

Welcome Home

Walking into a familiar haven after a day’s work or outing can feel so unassuming. There is a slight adrenalin rush knowing you are about to step into your own sanctuary.  The shoes get kicked off; the kettle put on to boil and it is time to mellow out with a cup of tea, coffee and for some, a wine. The first sip is ecstasy. Within your own four walls, whether it is a caravan, tent, mansion or shanty, you are allowed to be ‘YOU’.

 

The tangible ‘bricks and mortar’ aspect of your home can absorb and reflect your personality. It attracts what and who you are. Is it attracting the abundance you deserve? Have you control over your environment?

 

Tips on How to Improve the Energies of your Home

I am not a feng shui expert and have given up on working out directions and all the technicalities. I am an intuitive and go with what feels right for me and advise that you do the same. Let’s start the tour at the threshold, which is described as the mouth that nourishes the home.)

 

  1. A welcome mat serves as more than a shoe wiper. The word ‘WELCOME’ tells the world that you are ready to receive visitors bearing gifts of friendship, love, happiness, wealth and health. It also relays the message that you are happy to give of your hospitality.
  2. An exemplar passage way allows an air flow throughout the home. This is lost when the front and back door are in line, or there is a mirror throwing the energy back.  A painting of a water-fall will have a similar effect to a mirror.  Chi leaves as quickly as it arrives when it is reflected.
  3. A bad omen is to have the toilet in direct sight of the entry way. If this is the case, always leave the lavatory door closed.  Regardless of toilet position, always leave the cover down. Apart from the germs, it is said that money flushes down the potty that has its lid up.
  4. Do not be in the habit of dumping shopping bags, shoes, umbrellas and so on at the front door. Keep the area clear of clutter.
  5. A small table near the entrance with a few crystals, a bell, flowers or plant is ideal. An angel photo or statue of Archangel Michael is a reminder that the angels protect your space.
  6. A candle glow or small light guides the energy towards your home. We have a candle burning in our entrance area with a fake $100 note underneath as a stimulant.
  7. If your home is facing mountains or you live in a dry area, a flowing fountain can be placed in the front yard or near the entrance. Mountains supporting the energy from the back and water at the front are optimal.  Too much drenching though can drown your fortune.
  8. Just as I explained the entrance as the mouth, the living areas can be the heart of the home. Fresh fruit, flowers, plants, crystals, shells and happy family snaps all contribute to the semblance.
  9. Ward off negative radiation from electronics with a combination of clear quartz crystals and heavy stones such as Black Tourmaline, Smoky Quartz or Jasper.
  10.   Set the mood with sound. Sing, put on an uplifting CD, have fun with a bell or drum and listen with your eyes … you will notice the difference.
  11. Laugh! If you are a grumpy-bum then visitors to your home will feel uncomfortable. Laughter lifts the vibrations.
  12. Pets are wonderful, but be aware that savage animals are negative to have in your home, whereas cuddly pets give a loving cosy feel. Kitty Litter should be well away from the living area.
  13.  Clean your home regularly. You don’t have to have it spotless, but at least pleasantly clean and neat. If you are a busy person with little time for cleaning then at the least always empty your kitchen garbage daily.
  14.  Dark homes are gloomy. Think about how much natural light filters through. Are your walls too dark? Are the drapes too heavy? Contrary to this is a home in tropical climates with too much light.
  15.  Name your place of residence.

 

No matter where you live, the bottom-line is how happy you are in your abode. If you would rather be elsewhere, but are restricted then consider following a few of the suggested hints and watch the difference.

 

Name Your Home

The name of our home is ‘Tir-Na-Nog’.   ‘Tir-Na-Nog’ is an Irish fairy-tale describing a place of utopia where happiness lasts forever and ever.  As legend tells, it is an island located beyond the edge of the map.  The journey is dangerous and hard to endure, but the destination is rewarding. One might be lucky to receive an invitation from the fairy habitants, in which case the passage of transit is made easy. Suffering, sickness and death do not exist in the ‘Land of the Young’ as it is a place of eternal youth and beauty.

 

Affirmation for the Home
This affirmation can be written on the back of a drawing or a picture of your dream home.
“I am now living in, and enjoying the energy of my dream home. My home attracts only positive people and prosperity.”

 

Dawn Alice is a Brisbane Psychic and Author, who has superior knowledge of the Tarot and Numerology with expertise in the area of metaphysics. Dawn Alice is also a Reiki Master with a deep understanding of Crystal and Colour Therapy.  Visit Dawn's Profile at http://bit.ly/2mPLu1P

I've shucked and ducked "reality" more times than I care to share or admit, even to myself. It's a human reaction but it doesn't have to be our only mechanism for maintaining our mental sanity and emotional stability.

Every so often, we need to stop and LIVE. That is, we need to Let go, Imagine, Venture, and Enjoy.

To "LET GO" does not mean to stop caring, it means I can't do it for someone else. To "let go" is not to cut myself off, it's the realization I can't control another. To "let go" is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences. To "let go" is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands. To "let go" is not to try to change or blame another, it's to make the most of myself.

To "let go" is not to care for, but to care about. To "let go" is not to fix, but to be supportive. To "let go" is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being. To "let go" is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies. To "let go" is not be protective, it's to permit another to face reality.

To "let go" is not to deny, but to accept. To "let go" is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them. To "let go" is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes, and cherish myself in it. To "let go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future. To "let go" is to fear less, and love more. [1]

To IMAGINE means to welcome a world of possibilities. To imagine means to conceptualize a life where limits are nonexistent. To imagine implies creating a reality that supports your noblest aspirations. To imagine is to give permission to self to succeed.

To imagine is to accept that your life matters. To imagine is to make a decision to choose the path of excellence. To imagine means to celebrate others and their narratives. To imagine is to love without boundaries. To imagine means to nurture relationships.

To imagine is to welcome diversity. To imagine is to treat others as you would like to be treated. To imagine is to think of creative ways to express kindness to others. To imagine means to invite civility into our conversations. To imagine means there is a time to remain silent, and there is a time to speak.

To imagine means to accept the gift of the present and plan for the future. To imagine is to be accountable to others. To imagine means to listen with intention. To imagine means to be emotionally available to others.

To imagine means to create a world where goodness is the common currency. To imagine means to be a spark that ignites the flames of freedom and democracy. To imagine is to embrace a life of sacrifice and commitment, and an allegiance to truth.

To VENTURE means to deal with reality with a smile. To venture is to experiment with winning possibilities. To venture is to invest your time, energy, and effort into making the world a better place. To venture means to seek the thrill of adventure and excitement. To venture is to take a risk and believe it will work out.

To venture is not to exploit our natural resources, but to preserve the environment. To venture is not to put your future in jeopardy by making bad decisions, but to evaluate each decision and its consequences, unintended or otherwise. To venture is not to pursue greatness in itself, but to pursue a calling that enriches other people's lives.

To venture is not to remain in debt, but to create wealth and give it away. To venture is not to live aimlessly, but to live with a written plan. To venture is to help others reach their full potential. To venture is to give back to your community. To venture is to provide for your family.

To venture is not to remain comfortable in status quo living, but to create and innovate. To venture is to work in the direction of your passion. To venture is to see failures as an opportunities to begin again more intelligently. To venture is to utilize all of your gifts, skills, and abilities. To venture is to push yourself beyond the limits of your creative endurance.

To venture is to try something you've never tried before. To venture is to focus on solutions. To venture is to create your own opportunities and take responsibility for your success. To venture is to become the prototypical brand. To venture is to align your vision, creative energy, desire to win, and value into a tangible, relevant, and innovative product that changes the way people live.

To ENJOY life is to be free. Let's not allow the powerful currents of busyness to prevent us from enjoying life a life of freedom. While many of us lack sufficient free time to escape to a world of fun and adventure, we should still strive to enjoy every waking moment.

To enjoy is to have fun. To enjoy is to appreciate our loved ones. To enjoy is to delight in friendships. To enjoy is to take delight in others' success. To enjoy is to applaud small victories. To enjoy is to celebrate the life we have been given.

The reason for getting up each day is to find purpose and meaning in life. Right? Well, it's that... and more.

Although there would be no enjoyment in life if there weren't always something after which to pursue, being awakened to your purpose is more than seeking after something.

As divine beings, we were not designed to pursue purpose, but to be purpose. To pursue means to strive, shadow, track, and seek after something. When you say, "I'm pursuing my purpose," you are actually saying, I am chasing after something I have not yet experienced, and desire to experience.

When that specific pursuit becomes the basis of your existence, your entire reality becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. This is to say that in every relationship, every career opportunity, every waking moment will be defined by a sense of restlessness, uncertainty, instability, insecurity, and confusion. When something is in a constant state of flux, without the values of stability, constancy and permanence, it arouses fear and unrest.

Imagine being in a relationship where your partner spent his/her waking moments in the relentless pursuit of something that will give his/her life meaning, rather than investing quality time and presence in the relationship. Consider what it would be like working at your job for years, and never being able to experience the gift of using your imagination, creativity, and skills, because you were too busy searching for your niche.

Yes, there is something significant, beautiful, and divine about embracing your destiny. Indeed, there is something transcendent about living purposefully. Amidst life's greatest challenges, difficulties, and pain, we strive to make sense of our reality. In festive times and times of jubilation we make every effort to embrace the moment. It is at the point where our challenges, difficulties, pain, and moments of delight find meaning that our lives become meaningful.

Thus, to be means to live on purpose. In other words, to know your purpose is to know yourself. The reason why many people find purpose so elusive is because they are chasing after something they believe has not yet being realized.

Your purpose is neither an object, nor a product. It is not something that can be manufactured. Your purpose is not some grand experiment carried out in a science lab. Sitting in a classroom at an institute of higher learning will not produce purpose. Many people imitate what successful people do, and then say that they've found their purpose. Actually, what they have become is a copycat, an imposter, and inauthentic.

As much as your parents love you, they cannot pass on purpose as an inheritance. If you were given the gift of infinity, because of the construct of purpose, it would still elude you.

The nature of purpose is to be lived and experienced. Your purpose is a living and breathing reality. Your purpose is as much a part of you as your heart and brain are part of your body. The immanence of your purpose will settle in your being as you accept its reality.

Think of a person who is a phenomenal motivational speaker and does this for a living, and considers motivational speaking to be his purpose in life. Does motivational speaking in itself have any inherent value? The answers is, no. Motivational speaking is an abstract concept that describes the activity the motivational speaker executes.

Motivational speaking is an extension of the motivator's mindset. Motivational speaking is given context by the motivator himself. While a motivational speech might stir up positive reactions and emotions, it is the presenter's ability to engage the audience that gives life to the presentation. If you separated the concept (I.e., motivational speaking) from the speaker, on one side you'd have an inanimate concept, and on the other side a living and breathing person.

Here's another example. A civil engineer has accepted that designing modern and seismic safe bridges is her life's purpose. Remember, her purpose is designing bridges. When you separate this person from her work, what are left are the bridges and the person. Which of the two is the purpose? It's clearly the woman with the idea.

Let's look at one final example. Imagine a singer performing on stage with a microphone in her hand. The function of the microphone is not to replace the singer's voice, because it simply can't in that it is an inanimate object. The function of the microphone is to amplify the singer's creative expression and captivating melody.

In the examples given, the microphone, the bridges, and motivational speaking were the tools that gave context to the person's purpose. Purpose is not only oneness with self, but also oneness with the cosmos. When the mind, body, and spirit converge into oneness with the universe, and become awakened to its divine privilege, life no longer consists of trying to find purpose. At the point of convergence, your existence becomes your purpose. YOU are your purpose.

Reference:
1. Retrieved from http://www.livinglifefully.com/lettinggo.htm

JOSIAH SAMUEL HARRY currently serves as an adjunct instructor. He teaches subjects ranging from world cultures to psychology.
Josiah's research interests are in spiritual philosophy, religion, and humanistic psychology. His published works include: Awakening Humanity's Collective Spirit, and Winning: Essentials for Achieving Relational Intimacy.

Josiah was born and raised in St. Croix, U.S. Virgin Islands. He was educated at Loyola University New Orleans. An original thinker and truth-seeker, Josiah invites each individual inward toward a deeper reality that unveils the fundamental purpose of life, which is to ultimately find truth in our own lives and live in relationship with others.

 

Has it been a really busy few weeks for you too?

It has been hectic for me.

It has been a fortnight of back to back meetings, delivering several presentations, conducting telephone coaching, making time with my wife (who is pregnant with child number 3) and playing with my other two boys, exercising, returning emails...and that's just in the mornings!

By midweek, I'm looking for the 'emergency stop' button!

It is easy to get yourself overloaded and overwhelmed when there is a lot happening in your life.
I'm sure you know this feeling - like there is a never ending list of things to get done in your life.

It can wear you down...if you let it.

...it all depends on what you focus on.

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